It has been some time since I posted, hasn’t it? It’s been one of those moments in life for me, where everything hit at once between personal, family, and work. The dust has finally settled. I can breathe now. Phew! I am happy to be back to writing again.
It’s no secret that in those busy moments, some things must give or be put on hold. This blog was one example, and another example was some of the regular rituals and routines that were in place in my WLM. It certainly tested Thomas’s submission and he faltered a bit. If anything, our experience over the last few months reinforced with me, that many of the things I’ve shared on my blog, such as the importance of structure, discipline, and routines to reinforce your dominance/his submission, are spot on.
The good news, is that while we had some challenges, including a few arguments, we emerged from it with a stronger and improved relationship 😊. After a series of miss-steps with me, Thomas came to the realization that he had to change his mind-set from being submissive to me to being devoted to serving me. This ‘ah-ha’ moment came after a harsh punishment from me so I will take some credit for his revelation. Over the years, I had read various comments from guys expressing a high-level of devotion to their wife and I found it very admirable and sensed that there were only a small percentage of submissive men who were truly devoted to serving their wife. I was thrilled when my husband shared his revelation that he needed to be devoted to serving me.
What is Devotion in a WLM?
The devotion mind set is new to my WLM journey and so I am certainly not an expert on the topic. However, when I am faced with something new, I like to research and learn about it. A key finding from my research was gaining an understanding that when a person is devoted to something, they are dedicated to a cause that is beyond their own self-interest and serving that cause creates enthusiasm for them. In terms of WLM, I translated it to mean that the devoted husband experiences enthusiasm and pleasure from the act of serving his wife and doing whatever he can to make her happy. A devoted submissive husband does not wait to be told what to do and does not try to get away with things and avoid punishment; or in the case of my husband, wait for the punishment rather than ask for forgiveness when he knows he has done something bad. This ‘waiting to be punished’ was a problem for me.
The dedicated submissive strives to exceed his wife’s expectations and looks for every opportunity to make her life easier and uplift her with positive words. He accepts her faults without complaint. A submissive husband who matures to this state experiences fulfillment and pleasure from his devotion and by seeing his wife happy, pleasured, and pleased.
Since his confession, I have noticed a significant improvement in his servitude and a positive change in his attitude towards me. His chores are done timely and to perfection without prodding. He compliments me more, has a positive and welcoming tone when talking with me. If he slips up, he apologizes immediately. Even the smallest mistakes, ones that I may overlook, upset him and he strives to prevent them from happening again [Guys are you talking notes?]. It has been a fantastic change and has made me very happy and makes me feel special to be treated as a Goddess.
A devoted submissive is self-motivated. His motivation is driven by seeing his wife happy and pleasured as a direct result of his actions. Although there is self-motivation, incentive and encouragement from others keeps the motivation going and can propel a person’s devotion to a higher level. My control and domination over Thomas are what he enjoys and what keeps him performing to my expectations, so it is still important for me to continue to be strict and demanding with him and set high expectations for him to please me. This will keep his devotion to me high, while also ensuring that he is focused on the right things that make my life better. What I expect is that there will be less need for punishment. With less punishment, I plan to reward him for his devotion. His rewards will be exciting for him but will also be designed to encourage and promote his devotion.
Devotion Versus Submission
You can’t force someone to be devoted to you. You can certainly force them to do devotional rituals and acts of devotion, but meaningful devotions comes from within a person. As I noted earlier in this post, a devoted submissive husband is very admirable. I don’t expect that most men understand or even buy-in to the concept of devotion to their wife. My husband did not get it until his recent ‘Ah-ha’ moment. While he has been a great submissive to me in the past, there was always the expectation from him to get something in return for his servitude. That is not always a bad thing, but it highlights the difference between being a submissive husband versus being a devoted submissive husband. As a devoted husband, he appreciates anything I give him in return, and may even hope for it, but he does not expect it. His confession of devotion to me was recent and so the jury is still out on whether his devotion will remain strong. So far so good! I will certainly do what I can to keep it strong. Why wouldn’t I 😊?
For many years, I have benefited greatly from having a fantastic loyal submissive husband. His submission, along with my dominance, have brought us closer together and strengthened our marriage. If you are in this situation then you are very lucky. I would be very happy and satisfied if my husband remained a great loyal submissive for the rest of our marriage. However, a devoted husband is even better! I am excited at what the future holds. I hope that the women readers of this blog can experience devotion in your marriage and I also hope that the submissive readers are lucky enough to discover the joy and fulfillment of being a devoted husband.
A Devotion Exercise
To help the guy readers to move toward being devoted, below are daily or weekly reflections for you to do, which I came across in my research (and made a few modifications and additions). What I love about these is that they are very practical and not just fantasy play.
- List the reasons why you are grateful for your wife. On a daily or weekly basis, review the list and add to it if you think of new things.
- Each day, identify three ways to express your gratitude and love for your wife and act on them.
- Accept her for who she is – do not point out her mistakes; listen and do not project what she should do/be; fix mishaps and mistakes without telling her.
- Help her pursue her passions.
- Always yield to her.
- Think about what you can do to make her life better and put it into practice!
- Find ways to go above and beyond to please her. At least once a month act on these ideas.
Stay tuned for my next post where I will share thoughts on devotion activities and rewards that I plan to do to keep his devotion strong.
From Submission to Devotion
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