I used to be a romance addict. It’s as life was all about falling in love. I was crush obsessed and had my first boyfriend when I was in eighth grade. I met him in youth group and he became the sole reason why I attended. We were on and off for ten years because I was confused and in constant search for somebody better. In short, I was very immature and selfish.
Thankfully, God knocked on my heart like never before. I told him that we needed to rethink our relationship. I eventually ended it because I didn’t have peace due to the compromises that we were making, which I knew hurt the heart of God. I realized I had emptiness and wounds as a child that broke my self-worth and I was trying to mend it with romantic relationships. That’s why nothing ever really worked.
I started walking more closely with God and respecting His boundaries especially when it came to my body. Slowly my heart started to discover to His purpose in my life. 2 Timothy 2:21 came true in my life: “Therefore if anyone cleanses himself from what is dishonorable, he will be a vessel for honorable use, set apart as holy, useful to the Master, ready for every good work.”
My dreams started to come true and God led me to more truths. One truth was that even for romance, He has an order. The world promotes finding your mate first but that quickly becomes messy and then life becomes miserable. God’s order, on the other hand is Master . . . Mission . . . Mate. So many people are so hungry for relationships because they didn’t experience healthy and whole love in their childhood. Because they are in the relationship for the wrong reasons, they allow themselves to be used and abused. They become trapped in unnecessary entanglements and never discover the great purpose God assigned to their lives.
I realize now that God wasn’t being stingy with me by not giving me a significant other. He just wants me to find my greatest joy in Him first, to know how valuable and loved I am in His eyes and have a clear sense of purpose. I couldn’t count the times he led me to say no to a suitor and then later on discovered how much He was protecting my heart. My mission now is to help as many women as I can to discover that they’re far more precious than diamonds and to help as many people as I can to break patterns of generational sins.
I believe with all my heart God wants us to be healthy single people so we will only choose a healthy partner, because He loves not only us but our future children who deserve to grow up in healthy holy, happy homes.
Why is my forever taking forever?